If you are reading this post, you are probably single and trying to find out how to get your crush to like you. You have tried sending him/her signs that you have a crush on them and want them to be a part of your life but it seems like all your efforts are going unnoticed. Luckily, there are various steps that you can take in order to get your crush’s attention. However, you first have to understand the key reasons why your crush is behaving in a manner which suggests that he/she does not like you or doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you.
So what’s the problem? You’re probably not giving your crush enough space?
When you are determined to make sure that your crush is attracted to you and make him/her want to be in a relationship with you, your natural reaction is to try and communicate your feelings to them. As such, you are more likely to send your crush a barrage of texts, social media messages, make special ‘affectionate’ posts on their social media page, call him/her anytime you feel like you miss them, or even go to the lengths of appearing at their doorway uninvited “just to say hi”.
Of course, you are doing all these actions with the best intentions in mind but put yourself in your crush’s shoes for a minute. He/she is probably on the verge of screaming stalker at the top of their lungs! Always remember that there is nothing more off-putting than a man or woman who basically will not leave you alone.
In your thoughts, you are rationalizing your actions by thinking that by persistently being in your crush’s face, either physically or through various methods of communication, he/she will think more about you and will want to date you. Sadly, this cannot be farther from the truth. In reality, your crush is thinking of you as a bothersome person who needs to be swiftly gotten rid of and will probably take any measure necessary to avoid you.
Whether you would like to believe it or not, I’ll be the first to let you know that if you performed any of the actions mentioned above, then you are the cause of your crush’s development of a negative perception of you and is why he/she is not responding to the various signals of affection you have been putting across. That’s right! You are the problem.
How do you fix the Problem? The simple answer to this question is “Communication”.
Step 1: Learn how to get your crush to like you intellectually
In terms of intellect, you have to start off with easy conversations on a specific topic that you know your crush likes to talk about. In this highly technologized world where everyone shares their entire life over social media, this step ought to be easy. However, researching to find out your crush’s favorite topic via social media should not, by any means, encourage cyber stalking!
That noted, always remember that during your initial conversations, your crush may not yet be ready to talk about dating or relationships in general, and it is always best to avoid the topic unless he/she brings it up. If your crush opts to bring up the dating topic, it is time to take your chances at winning him/her over emotionally.
Step 2: Learn how to get your crush to like you emotionally
During your conversations, be sure to listen keenly, do not interrupt him/her, and take accountability for sending any unclear ‘affectionate’ messages. For instance, you may have inadvertently harassed your crush by over-communicating and this may have put him off. Should he mention this issue, your response to his/her statements must be honest and sincere. This is the only way you can get past your crush’s emotional defenses and win him/her emotionally.
How to Get You Crush to Like You Enough to Date You: Create emotional Momentum to keep the communication going
Now that the steps in the first approach have worked to open up the lines of communication between you and your crush, the next solutions that will teach you how to get your crush to like you and want to date you require that you create an emotional momentum that will guarantee that this communication continues.
The first step in creating emotional momentum is devising topics before your next conversation to make sure that should your crush decide to call, you will have something to talk about other than your emotions. As a key rule for this strategy to work and effectively teach you how to get your crush to like you and keep talking to you habitually, make sure that each conversation you have with him/her lasts no longer than five (5) minutes.
This ensures that you will be less likely to get off topic and start throwing hints that indicate that you want more than they may be willing to offer you in terms of a relationship. Moreover, a conversation that lasts more than five minutes may bore your crush and put him/her off talking to you for good.
Time for Some Relationship Psychology: Keep Your Crush Attracted!
Learning how to get your crush to like you enough to date you requires that you employ some serious relationship psychology. You need to attract him/her to your personality, not attract attention to yourself (this is what you have been doing by over-communicating). Therefore, in order effectively learn how to get your crush to like you and keep him/her attracted you require that you:
- Exude the qualities that you know your crush is looking for in a partner and embody these qualities. This process requires that you dig deep into the thoughts of your crush which should be easy since you now have a perfect line of communication going! However, avoid acting ‘the part’ as it will encourage you to make up stories/white lies that will eventually catch up with you and make all your efforts worthless.
- Exude self-confidence.
- Act aloof for a while (This is also an important part of creating emotional momentum through communication). When you go silent for a little while, your crush is likely to wonder why you suddenly stopped communicating him/her. Without their knowledge, what you have done is made them think about you. Eventually, he/she is bound to contact you and open the lines of communication again.